The daily description of my life in hell (otherwise known as the Wann Langston Memorial Library). Pretty much.
Friday, March 01, 2002
I meant to write this yesterday but this site was all slow and i have no patience but here you go:
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALISON!!!!
It's everything you've always wanted...for at least however long it takes anyone to read this - they will be completely focused on you! Haha
Hope you have a good one. 23, yup yup. posted by Sadie at 10:08 AM
Thursday, February 28, 2002
Say "phlegm"
did anyone pronounce phlegm like phleem? no, well, that's because you are not an utter moron like Dan. Seriously, how can he not prounce phlegm? Especially since he works in a hospital. A fucking hospital where the word phlegm is repeated at least a million times a day.
Seriously.
Then, explaining his sons barfing phleem and other stuff up (In my head I suggested it my be his body trying to purge him of himself) Dan explains it with 'asthma'. Oh yeah, cause asthma is often characterized by throwing up. All the shortness of breath, dizziness oh no that's only second to the never happens throw up. Apparently, according to dan, asthma is gastroentestinal.
According to dan, phlegm is pronounced pleem. You make the call. posted by Sadie at 2:01 PM
Wednesday, February 27, 2002
This post is for all the Bird Library ex-employees which would be everyone excepting Johnny Wes and Peter so everyone else. Back me up on this - when we worked there, there was only like one person or maybe two who worked during the day right? And they never stuff Interlibrary envelopes, right? Cause they were Willines little gophers.
I'm talking to Dan today (my first mistake) about how the Bird Library keeps sending our ILLs to the wrong place. He thinks it's because of the students. I say no the students don't do that and he says "Yes they do."
Oh hellll no. Helll no. He is not going to try and tell me what I wouldn't know about the job I was at like five months ago. So I tell him all the stuff I said in at the beginning of this and he goes, "well that's how they do it at OU".
Once again, Dan, FUCK OU. and you know what...we weren't even talking about OU. And how would he know what OU does unless he goes down there and watches. Which he probably does every night just to get away from his ablino frog and mute spouse.
Times Dan's heart has beaten today (2pm): 4 posted by Sadie at 2:28 PM
CAFETERIA PART 2
So there I am - still puzzled over gerkins. I start to peel my orange. And let's just get something straight right here right now. This was a good orange. I was juicy and normal. Peeling, peeling when I hear some sort of gagging noise. I look up and some girl is staring at me looking like she ate a gerkin. Then, after I peel some more she says "Stop, stop your orange smells so bad."
I ask you, how can an orange smell bad? It's a scented oil flavor. Generally, oranges smell. Good. So I'm all "what?"
HER: Your orange.
ME: It smells normal to me.
HER: Please stop.
Then she gags some more but I have a feeling that was just for effect. I'm starting to sort of freak out now. I mean, are they fucking with me? Her and her friends who have access to prescription medication. Are they on those meds? One is pregnant surely she isn't taking extra perdacin on the side. Or is this chick honestly repulsed by oranges? I decide to just sit there and finish peeling and then maybe apologize when suddenly Orange Issue girl stands up and runs from the cafeteria.
And her friends - who should be looking at me like sorry our pal is a nutcase - are looking at me like I'm a bitch.
What a strange lunch hour I had yesterday. posted by Sadie at 9:58 AM
CAFETERIA PART 1 OF MY STRANGE 30 MINUTES:
I have a serious issue to discuss - the Cafeteria. I don't know what's happening to it. First, they close off the cozy, two seater room so now I have to sit at a big table and I feel sort of bitchy when I tell people they can't sit there. Then, they close down the make your own sandwich bar. What am I supposed to eat now? The egg rolls - not likely. Sandwichs are what you eat for lunch. Not mashed potatoes, not apple crisp. Sandwiches. Luckily for them, they sell soup and premade sandwiches so I am not as pissed.
So I go to get some soup yesterday. The sign says Chicken Gumbo. Not bad. I open up the lib and - what the - no it's some kind of joke! I close the lid and lift the other same kind, different bin lid. Jesus! There it is in this batch too!! Gerkins! Gerkins. God what? who puts gerkins in anything? Gerkins are like God's freak vegetable. No, no they are God's stillborn vegetable. A woman comes by and starts to get soup. Now, normally I have a rule about talking to anyone unless it's to tell them they can't sit at my table. I felt I had to warn her though.
"There are gerkins in that soup. Gerkins."
"I like gerkins."
Whaaaaat? I would never even try a gerkin, much less eat a gerkin and very much less like a gerkin. I about threw up. I got some soup minus the gerkins which was sort of hard and sat down. posted by Sadie at 9:51 AM
Tuesday, February 26, 2002
I think they are poisoning me through this delicious coffee. I noticed the coffee yesterday. MMM, I thought, the little ladies in Medical Records can make a good pot - if I can catch the last glass. Now, again today at a totally different time. The last glass. Oh, I'm sorry mug, whatever. I'm addicted. I love this coffee.
Yet, I noticed something at lunch yesterday.
I think - no, I know - my teeth are softer. I feel it and I have an idea that's it's the coffee. But I can't stop drinking it.
The big question here is - why would Integris want my teeth to go to mush?
Also, another big question is - Dan drinks about three cups to go with his three breakfasts so why hasn't his teeth gone soft?
Also, an even bigger question is - what was CH-eryl thinking? I mean, a perm! posted by Sadie at 10:25 AM
Monday, February 25, 2002
yes, well, it has been an uneventful day. CH-eryl is gone which means I'm not doing shit. Dan is - well, being ignored. In fact the only thing worth mentioning today comes from the candy jar - my unexpected source of amusement.
So doctor who cares come in (he knows my name, how odd - oh wait I'm wearing my nametag from lunch) and he starts to try and get candy out. As I've mentioned before it's sort of hard to do. Well, he gets one and it comes shooting out, rolling across the desk and onto the floor. He does this again....and again...and again. After about eight m and ms loose their lives he leaves. Never once did he put his hand underneath the little hole. What a dipshit, huh?
Friday, March 01, 2002
